We are one month in to 2018 and my life is already a rollercoaster of ups and downs. While leaving out the extreme personal stuff, like my daily battle with anxiety, I will attempt to give you a recap of my life and my many misadventures. For starters, I no longer work at a bar which is psychologically satisfying. I served 5 years as the Head of Security and this only added more stress and magnified my anxiety. I jumped off the boat at the first opportunity that presented itself.
This brought about other complications. I had a couple weeks of free time and this was painful. My mind rebels at stagnation. With a bit of motivation from some minor grief, I have been writing up a storm. I finished the first draft of a novel back in November and I have slowly started the revision process along with revising several short stories I have neglected. Recent motivations caused me to write a screenplay, first one, and it has been revised once. I am hoping to produce the film within the year, but it does not follow a traditional film script, and this could cause complications.
I have also started writing online articles in the hopes of starting a writing career. I wrote a couple articles for BuzzFeed and you can view them Here. I also have a couple articles on my LinkedIn profile and you can view those Here. The writing I am most proud of are the articles featured on TheMighty.com. These articles help me cope with and better understand my anxiety and it is a great place for people with any disorder to go and feel like a part of a community. Just because you are struggling does not mean you are broken. You can view all those articles Here.
As far as work and making money, I have actually turned down a couple jobs because I did not want to work some crap office job that I would hate after a couple years, just like every other job I have ever done. I am trying my hand at this freelance gig and hope that it pays off. I need more writing projects and I am already working on doing more in the entertainment industry of Tucson with my company, VaudVil. It will be a long process and none of it will be easy, but I am so much more satisfied with my life even with all the uncertainty. I think I am finally ready for my future.
As the year comes to a close, one reflects on everything that has transpired. So many horrible things have happened and yet, I can see light at the end of the tunnel. I have nothing but a sense of hope for the coming new year. I feel there will be more tragedies and horrors for the world overall but my personal life, my small world, my tiny existence is about to move into a place it has never been. I cannot say exactly what I mean because I personally don’t even know what I mean. Things will get better.
Here are some of the hopes, dreams, and goals I have for the coming year. I hope to get a new job that does not involve working nights and hopefully pays well. Arguing and wrestling with drunks lost its appeal many years ago and I hope to never work in a bar environment for the rest of my life. With a new job that frees up my nights and weekends, I will perhaps have more of a social life. Although, I’ve never been much of a social person due to my anxiety, but I will have the opportunity and that makes me happy.
Having recently finished the first draft of a novel, I know that my writing endeavors will evolve over the next year. My skills as a writer are growing and there are several things I need to work on to improve but I have the tools I need to achieve this. I feel I will surely have something published soon. If not in 2018, I will definitely have something published in 2019. I hope to have more blog entries starting with this one. I will not make any promises other than writing more. Less concrete goals work better for me.
I have always felt I would change the world with my writing but felt there were many obstacles and barriers preventing my achievement of this. I believe I know what these barriers are and I have a plan for removing them one at a time. It will be a long process but I will achieve my goals. I want to mention that all these hopes and dreams and goals are not New Year Resolutions. They are simply goals one sets in one’s life. My New Year Resolution is the same every year. Be awesome and feel sexy. I meet this goal every day of every year.
I hope to bring some of my newly found skills in writing to you, the public of potential or aspiring writers. There are many things I was told over the years about writing but no one could ever offer examples of how to achieve these things. Sometimes I thought they were just regurgitating what others had always told them. I have found examples of these common things to avoid and, more importantly, examples of how to fix them. It will take some time to implement these changes but I feel confident that I will finally reach success.