This is not a post about resolutions or any “new year, new me” nonsense. I prefer setting goals rather than resolutions. Goals are easier to attain and they are more flexible with the uncertainty of life. Goals can be adjusted and revised. There’s less pressure to achieve a goal as long as you’re working towards that goal. The accomplishment is still there. This is why people don’t follow through with resolutions. There’s too much pressure to sustain that resolution for the entire year. Making short-term achievable goals is more realistic than resolutions.
Many people try going to the gym for a new year’s resolution. After a few weeks, they stop going. I suggest you set a goal to eat healthier food and try to be more active. These goals are easier to achieve and you don’t have to focus on these things every single day. Goals are intended to start out small and gradually build. Maybe one year, going to the gym three times a week will be an achievable goal. But first you have to get yourself to that point. You can’t jump to the finish line. Life is never that easy.
I have a few goals of my own. These are things I’ve been working on over that past year and plan to continue. I’m saving money to one day get a down payment for my own house. It’ll be a couple years before I have enough saved so this is more of a long-term goal. I also plan to finish my novel this coming year. I have about 15 chapters left to write. That might seem like a lot, but I have 33 chapters finished. I’ve finished the majority making the finish more attainable. Those are just a couple of small things I’m preparing for the new year. What goals have you made? What does the new year hold for you?
I won’t have a New Year’s Resolution this coming year. I won’t because I’m already doing things to better myself. The last couple years haven’t been easy for me. Much of that was my own fault. Many things had to happen in order for me to notice. I felt I had hit rock bottom in early October 2019. I don’t think I’ve ever felt that low. Had I lost my job on top of everything else that happened, I’m not sure what I would have done. I almost lost everything in my life. My whole world went topsy-turvy.
Long story short, I was too negative for too long. It had built up over these last two years. I didn’t notice until it was too late. I lost motivation. I lost confidence in myself. I lost friendships. Since early October, I’ve been changing how I look at and talk to myself. It’s working. But I still have a long journey ahead. I filed for bankruptcy. My court date is in January. I had a couple student loans in default. I’ve gotten one out of default and the other is on its way out of default. Bankruptcy doesn’t affect student loans.
I’m being nicer to those close to me. Some chose not to be a part of my life because of the negativity. I hope the Universe brings them back into my life during the new year. I’m also being nicer to myself. I thought I was doing enough before to combat the negativity. But I feel short of the mark. I had to increase my efforts tenfold to see a difference. I’ve spent a lot of time alone. I can’t afford to go out to most things. Some things are too far for bus rides or I can’t afford the money for bus fare. I’m keeping an eye out for things to do so I can meet new people.
I relied on those close to me too much. I’m sure this is why they pushed me away. I’m doing more to keep myself occupied when I don’t have money for other activities. I’ve been using my camera more. I enjoy taking pictures. I’m reading and writing more. I’m doing as much as I can with what I have. Every night before bed, I write down three good things that happened to me that day and why they were important to me. This is the biggest thing that’s helped. I’ve done this every day for almost three months.
My journey has only begun. I have so far to go and no idea how long it will take. But I keep moving forward. I’m hunting for the good in things. I’m staying positive. I’m not allowing my thoughts to consume me. I’m getting by. I’m surviving. I’m not making a New Year’s Resolution because I’ve already made a resolution for life. And since I’ve already started, I have no fear of giving up. I’ve done this too long now to quit. While you all start something new and eventually stop, I’ll continue what I started. I’ll continue because I like myself. I love myself. And I deserve good things.