Coffee and Contemplation: National Coming Out Day

This might be a more interesting conversation we have this morning. National Coming Out Day began back in 1988 to encourage people to stop living in the closet and be proud of their sexuality. I identify as Demisexual, leaning towards asexual. Demisexual individuals need a strong emotional bond with someone before they get fully sexually aroused. Asexual individuals show less interest in sex, but that doesn’t mean they don’t enjoy sex. If you want to know more, I recommend you do a quick google search. I have been vocal about this for many years once I learned about and understood these sexualities.

I would also like to make this day about coming out with one’s mental health struggles. Many are ashamed of their mental illnesses. There is no shame in having a mental illness. Sometimes it involves chemicals in your body being out of balance. Sometimes it’s because you faced some awful or difficult situations in your life. Having a mental illness means you survived. Be proud of surviving. I have talked about my personal struggles with PTSD, Anxiety, and Depression. I’m vocal about it and I think those who know me understand and accept me more than they did before. Coming Out Day is really about not having secrets. No secrets from your friends and family. No secrets from yourself. Don’t hide who you are.

Coffee & Contemplation: Pride Month

June is Pride Month. It’s about being proud of who you are and your sexuality, whatever it is. Homosexual, heterosexual, bisexual, pansexual, demisexual, asexual; it comes in all shapes and sizes. The point is being proud of who you are. I identify as demisexual. This means I cannot reach full sexual arousal unless I have an emotional connection with the person. I’m not going to go into further details in this post. 

June is also PTSD Awareness Month. May was Mental Health Awareness Month so we’ll continue spreading awareness. June 27 is PTSD Awareness Day, and I’ll share more about that around that time. I have PTSD from various traumas I’ve experienced since childhood. This also caused me to have anxiety and depression. I have spent the last few years attempting to overcome some of my issues. I succeeded in some places and failed in others. 

The biggest thing for me is to no longer feel ashamed of having a mental illness. And to no longer feel ashamed of past transgressions. I’ve made many mistakes. I’ve lost people I cared about because I wouldn’t face my problems. I won’t feel sorry for myself anymore. I ask that everyone have pride in fighting against a mental illness. Be proud of the progress you’ve made. The point of Pride Month is to love yourself. So, bring awareness to your community and be proud of everything you’ve overcome.

Tuesday Poetry: Demisexual

It’s always been different for me
I used to think it was
Because of anxiety
I’m uncomfortable around new people
Connecting with someone romantically
That never happens right away
It takes time to feel attracted to someone
They are often friends and 
Often don’t feel the same
Rejected
Sometimes they ignore and avoid me
I get over it
I can even maintain the friendship
If the other person wants to
But finding a partner
Is a losing battle
I don’t want to feel alone anymore
Friendships never last
I’ve been called prudish
I’m not sexual or romantic
I try but fail
Is it worth trying again

From the poetry collection Cats, Coffee, Catharsis.