Hellpets – Part 2

Read Part 1


            After the human died, the daughter dropped me off at the animal shelter. I’ve been here for three days and there’s been no sign of Ligur my manager. You’d think with all his special abilities he’d at least have sent me a message.

            Most humans want to adopt kittens, so I’m left alone in here. It’s a nice vacation from my assignments. I don’t care much for being in a cage. I could break out but that requires effort. We’ll see how long I last before some creeper tries to take me home and put me in a soup.

            “Well this trash box is cozy.”

            “Dammit Ligur! I was almost asleep. Where the Hell have you been?”

            “Um…Hell?”

            “Don’t be a smart ass.”

            “I wouldn’t be true to myself if I wasn’t. Let’s review your adoption sheet. Oh! The humans call you Duchess? At your service my liege.”

            “Go sit on a firecracker.”

            “You speak with such elegance. Lucky for you, this is where you’ll meet your next assignment.”

            “Is that why you didn’t bother coming to see me sooner?”

            “I’m not exclusive to you, your highness. I do have several other familiars to look after.”

            “You could have sent a message.”

            “I’m giving you a message now. Sit tight. Your next assignment will come adopt you.”

            “Fine. Who’s the mark?”

            “His name is Charles Brady. Everything’s in the file.”

            “Is he another moron who thinks he’s special?”

            “He’s the real deal but has no idea. You’ll be his familiar, but you’ll also need to keep an eye on his other companion. It’s all in the file.”

            “Who’s the other companion? Another familiar?”

            “Read the file.”

            “That requires effort.”

            “I can always send you back downstairs. You did enjoy working in the HR office.”

            “Fine.”

            “Don’t strain yourself. I know words are hard for you.”

            “You’re a pain in the ass.”

            “You’re just now figuring that out?”

            “Shut up. Wait…is that right? He has a Hellhound?”

            “Indeed. A new program they’re trying. You get to watch the human and show the Hellhound the ropes.”

            “I hate you and wish you would die.”


Read Part 3

Hellpets – Part 1

            “Who’s a precious little baby? Who’s the sweetest kitty?”

            Old woman I will end you.

            “Meow meow. Meow meow.”

            Get out of my face Hag!

            “Oh! Duchess Minerva Skimbleshanks! Don’t be naughty!”

            I will bite your finger off.

            “You sit there on the chair and think about what you’ve done.”

            The only thing I’m thinking about is how happy I’ll be when this assignment’s over. You are, by far, the worst human I’ve ever watched over. You don’t even know magic. You can’t use tarot cards. Burning sage in people’s homes doesn’t make you a witch.

            “I’ve never heard you meow so much Duchess. You sure are a chatter box this morning.”

            Sit on a cactus Fustilug.

            “Oh my. I’m feeling a bit flushed. I better get some water.”

            Please stop telling me everything you’re thinking.

            “Oh. Something…doesn’t feel right. I better…have a sit down.”

            Is it happening? Don’t tease me old woman. And with the shattering of glass, she is down. I didn’t think you would ever croak. Enjoy Hell. Say hit to Carol in HR.

            I’m a Hellcat. I was born from the fires of Hell. I work as a familiar to humans. I watch over them until they die and make note of any magic abilities they have. Most humans have no magic. And morons like the corpse on this kitchen floor think they have magic when they don’t.

            And my name isn’t Duchess. It’s Haura. I can’t communicate with humans to tell them my name, so I have to put up with whatever they call me. This old woman was more irritating than any other I’ve been around. Maybe I’ll have time to eat some of her body before my manager shows up with my next assignment. Damn! Someone’s at the door.

            “Mom, are you home? I brought you some bagels from this new bakery near my office. Mom? Oh, hello Duchess. Pst pst pst.”

            Like mother like daughter. I hate your whole family.

            “Do you know where mommy is? Is mommy home?”

            I despise baby talk. Please stop.

            “Maybe she’s out for a bit. Let’s make ourselves a snack. Oh my God! Mom? Mom!”

            Sometimes I think humans believe screaming and crying will reverse death.


Read Part 2

Serial Fiction Starts Next Week

If you follow me on social media, you have heard by now that I have a new segment coming to this blog. Serial fiction begins on Friday, October 2. I’ve written a short story and broken it into parts. I’m releasing one part each week through the end of November. That gives me plenty of time to start working on the next story to serialize on my blog. Each part will be short and quick to read. As new parts are posted, I’ll link them to previous posts and the previous post will get linked to the new post. 

Also, you’ll notice in the menu bar, a section where links to all the parts can be found. Check out the Serial Fiction Page to see the dates when all the parts are scheduled to post. This first serialization is titled HellPets. A Hellcat and a Hellhound learn to tolerate one another while working to guide and collect souls for the Underworld. They’re a spooky odd couple and they’re cute animals. What could go wrong? I hope to have many installments of these demon pets over the next couple of years. For now, this is chapter 1 starting next week. I hope you all enjoy.